Tom Shattuck's Simple But Useful Hotel Tips

I've picked up a few things over the years

First, it should be known that I’m a petty thief and hotels are where most of my pilfering takes place.

It’s not personal.

I feel that if I can find my way into the housekeeping closet and avail myself of tiny shampoo and conditioner bottles, etc, I am getting one over on the establishment. The establishment that routinely gets one over on me.

To Gipe: To steal.

Obviously, giping from the HSKP closet is a winner though you need to be armed with an excuse as to why you are skulking around the back of the house. Tell them you are just looking for extra towels or whatever.

They won’t believe you. They know you’re wretched but they’ll humor you.

I don’t ever gipe from the housekeeping cart. Those workers load up their carts to service the rooms on their schedule and disrupting their inventory would inconvenience them.

Remember, the housekeepers are the good guys like you and me. We’re trying to stick it to the man.

Some housekeeping closets - and I cannot tell you how I know this for fear I will be arrested - are locked on timers and only unlock at say, six or seven o’clock in the mornings.

I’ve “heard” you can hear the doors unlock.

So there you go. That’s it for giping for today.